Sunday, July 15, 2012
Fashion and Frump
While sitting at work I tend to do a lot of people watching, what not to wear and how not to act. I would like to dedicate this blog to the fashion-less. There are some characters that have graced the mall with their presence over the years..the kind that make you wish you had a secret camera built in to you earrings. The short tie guy could be the most frequent visitor....a short, chunky man that walks around with a full width tie that is no longer than three inches long....that my friends takes talent to do without having the tiny end hanging. The wild safari lady....this lady might be confused with the passerby people...they do look like a herd of wild boars at first glance....but ma'am you are not in Africa my dear lady...no need for full on khaki. Although I might suggest buying http://www.exofficio.com/about/press-releases/exofficio-underwear-17-countries-6-weeks-and-one-pair if you are indeed going on a safari, Chelsea Handler also endorses so you know they are legit! Also, really the full on safari hat too....these are judging eyes. Creepy sports guy, although you are a very nice guy, no girl knows who won a football championship in 1978, much less who the quarterback is? AND that wouldn't be so bad except when you don't want to talk about sports he stares at you until a.) someone walks in for you to help or b.) a guy walks up that is willing to discuss the conversation in more depth. Although these are not fixtures at Mount Berry I do feel as though I should makes some honorary mentions.... Pennylady this 50 year old walks around the mall all day long with a hump that may or may not be the direct result of her profession...walking around malls picking up loose change from the floor. This lady walks not only around the mall but the stores the mall houses head down, never any word exchange about what she is doing with her plastic bag (hopefully) full of change. I really wish someone would tell her about Lenox mall maybe she could meet up with dollar dollar bill guy there.Daywalker? or Nightwalker? as coming in to work today my colleague Holli had to mention this lady decided to get dressed up to come to the mall....lady had multiple bumpits in and bright pink clothes playing up all her assets...no joke it was for the world to see :) Apparently Julia Roberts character in Pretty Woman was her idol with her hooker boots and sparkly pink scarf did I mention said lady was past her prime,,,some people just can't let go of the past and to make matters worse her "pimp daddy" was a short balding man. I know in a power of position I would like to keep my treasure towering over me as well. And last but not least Trench coat guy. Ole homeboy showed up in what would be called a top hat but in his case lets call in a low hat and full on trench coat. What he was wearing underneath is still a mystery but let us let our minds wander to the worst and to make his whole outfit what else would he be wearing on his feet...oh yes tennis shoes to make a quick getaway. :) What has everyone learned from this...wear something normal and if not please go all out to make someones day.